I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
His hands were made for my vagina.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
