Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
