yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
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