i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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