you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
OPIZZABONMYDICK
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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