is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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