I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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