is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
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