he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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