I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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