But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
