Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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