He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
