Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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