i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Everclear isn't food dammit
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I think i got beer on your cat.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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