Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize