So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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