Me. At least after what I've been through.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Randomize
