It's Friday. Sex?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
