I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize