he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
