Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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