I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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