She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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