Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
