Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize