yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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