If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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