I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
