Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
