Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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