I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
