Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
