just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize