Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
