it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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