Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
