What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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