Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Me too!
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Randomize
