ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize