I think im going to throw up on grandma
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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