Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
