do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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