a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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