When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
We need to get me chipped asap
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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