We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
