Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
