i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
