So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Randomize
