she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
