she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
